Invitation Versus Demand


Question mark

Question mark (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I base my writing of The Jungle Pack Workbook (counseling), on the results witnessed from using finish-the-statement prompts.  I find that a lot of the question-asking comes across as trying to trick the client, to give up the gold (hidden personal information).  Also, I recognize the minimal education for growing kids and full-grown adults, in the context of how to build personal awareness.

Most people have a hard time with understanding their personal strengths and what triggers emotions in both themselves and others.  The prompts mentioned earlier, were designed to take the focus off of the person’s struggle to meet expectations of a counselor’s question.  One of the main elements I do my best to drop is any sense of testing.  Most people have experienced enough school-type testing to have a “right or wrong answer” state of expectations to deal with when posed a question.  When asked about information the child or adult is defending, the inquiry is thought of as a demand.  Obviously this did not work the first few hundred times in school, at work or in the home.

If a person is coming to me for counseling at any age, he or she has already met many reasons to defy trust in others.  Along with this, is a reoccurring propensity to feel angered with people.  The world already looks scary at this point.  Otherwise, the promise of confidentiality wouldn’t be considered so appealing.  But even in the counseling session, trust must be earned by the therapist.  And we find many times, this is no easy task in regards to the information which keeps a person stuck.

 

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