Oftentimes, we try to pass through small windows of opportunity with old beliefs that don’t fit. It’s like forcing a huge square peg through a small round hole. We bang, push, cry, yell and say “This is so unfair!”
We expect to make friends with people who want to be treated differently than our old pals; the ones who are used to our usual behavior. Yes, some people will stick around and take the same old crap. It’s called low self-esteem. But to have new and maybe even better opportunities with different people, the same old crap won’t work. The size of our baggage blocks our ability to see this.
Maybe our old beliefs have worked in the past. We put value on how many times the loyal friends and family members kept coming back, no matter how insidious we acted at times or maybe even all the time. We tend to look at this as being worth more than the potential for new experiences that foster real growth.
Remember that thing called “inflation”? How many times have we refused to drop a useless pattern of thinking or an outdated belief, because of how it serves us in the name of comfort? It’s like refusing a job that can possibly reap ten times more money, but the level of initial discomfort keeps us in a job that only earns a meager salary.