Most of us want to experience more in life. We want to do better in quite a few different areas, whether it having a greater financial situation or increased physical strength. A lot of us can attest to wanting our relationships with certain people to make more sense. The only barrier to this, is the strength of ego. Ego is what has each of us settling back into a safe “reality” on a daily basis. Ego is the safety governor that works against every idea of personal freedom and measures of assertiveness. It is the stuff that throttles a person with tinges of guilt or creeping embarrassment when he or she is about to take an action, that goes against their yesterday.
The messages which give proof of a personal safety governor:
“I’ll look stupid.”
“They/ he/ she will think I’m some sort of weirdo.”
“I’m coming on too strong.”
“I’m not ready yet.”
“They’re not ready yet.”
“I’m just being impulsive.”
“Have to do this first.”
The train of self-sabotage goes on and on. We rationalize that the messages and accompanying emotions are there for a reason and the doubts make sense. What doesn’t make sense is the restlessness and time spent looking back on what could have been. What really does not make any sense is the time spent bitching about the current state of affairs and talking about what someone else is able to do. It’s kind of like forfeiting one’s right to take part in life. When anyone of us stands there and says “I wished I had that kind of talent” while speaking about someone else’s accomplishment, it is the same as “I give up.”
I have news for anyone who operates such a premise. The personal ego “defense system” is blind to reality. Fear, self-doubt and inner criticism are based on expectations and beliefs, which are nothing more than stories fabricated in the mind. While still inside the mind, they are but mere shadows. Are shadows supposed to be the ruling body?
Aside from making sure that therapy sessions are actually effective, I also want to facilitate conversation or play in a way that uses time management. The Jungle Pack workbook is with the intention of helping other therapists tune into their client‘s struggle with themselves and each of the multiple environments (school, home and community). The prompts which cover universal situations for human beings of any age, gender and circumstance are meant to draw out conversation items. On a week to week basis, I and others in my field are faced with a client’s sense of confusion and struggle to set priorities for conversation. I will go ahead and speak for the lot of us and say that a therapist’s aim is to help the client (or consumer) to quit spinning his/ her wheels and move ahead. Time management and having an anchor for conversation go hand in hand for effectiveness in the direction of feeling better and out of idle.
David W. Peace